Monday, May 19, 2008

Rant and Rave

Ok-you must excuse me! I am going to throw a collasal fit!

I have got a couple of opinions about a couple of things.

First-I tivo "ksl 5" If you are not from utah, it is local morning show. So, they have a chick on promoting her swim suit line.

Ok-they are super cute suits. They have all kinds of little tricks and secrets that other suits don't have. So-of course, I am interested. What girl would not like to have the perfect suit?

So-the models come out. I am thinking, she is a 30 somthing mom, she is not a size 3, she will have "normal" models. NO!}


These models were all teenagers. They were all thin, and tall! (seriously, some were 5'10") So, the suits are darling on them. Well duh! Of course they are. They have yet to experience life. The worst things that they have to go through is a zit on the night before the dance. They have not had children and all the scars that come with child birth. They have never stressed out because their children were shoving small animals down the heat vent. They have never been stressed because their husband left on a 5 day fishing trip and you ate your body weight in crap while he was gone!

So-i don't think that these suits are all that and a bag of chips. If I looked like them, I would look fabulous in suit also. Come on fellow mom-you are normal, you don't look that way in swimwear, how can you expect, me, the mom with money, the mom who is your target market, to look that way in suit. Stupid stuoid chick. Now, I am not even going to go to her site, I bet she only has pics with skinny, sixteen year olds!!

Ok-next rage! So, I am a lover of purses! Really, the bigger the better! I look at peoples hair and purses. So-today I am running erands. Going to the bank, and the gas station (damn gas) and buy my husband clothes. He said that all his clothes shrunk. Really, all of them shrunk? Amazing! Anyway, I go to ross, find all the stuff for him, find me a couple of shirts and head out to the car, right on schedule! I get to the car..


I locked the keys in my car. Damn!!!

Well, my hubby's car is in the shop, so he couldn't come and get me. My mom wouldn't answer the phone, so I called my S-i-l who just had a baby. Luckily she said yes,! Yea. SO I ran home, grabbed the extra set of keys, jumped on Bonnie's car and zoomed to my hubby's office, zoomed to ross, zoomed to arbys to get my sister dinner, zoomed up the hill to pick up the kids who were at my moms, zoom home, feed my kids nasty $5 pizza and send them to bed.

I know, you are reading this and thinking, what does this have to do purses?

Well, in the midst of all this crap happening, I lost my cell phone (in my purse) I lost the extra set of keys (in my purse) I lost the chocate kiss (in the bottom of my purse) and that was the last straw! I really thought that when i got out of the car at the store, I dropped the keys in my purse.
So-are you seeing a pattern here? My purse in darling! Every body tells me how cute it is! I really love it, but it is time to let the big purses go. I have lost way too many things to keep it. I lose everything! It is a purse like those magic hats that you can just keep pulling stuff out of.

So-I am on the hunt, for a super cute purse that is a little bit more reasonable in size.

So-for a recap-I hate skinny sixteen year old swim suit models and I am freak cause I lose things in my purse.

So glad that this day will be over soon! I should sleep really well tonight!!!


Bridget said...

You aren't the only one who rants and raves about swimwear, I completely agree! The real "miracle" suit is the one that they make a full figured saggy mom look like a 17 yr. old girl- show me that suit then I'll be impressed ;o).

Thanks for the laugh tonight!

Megan Dinsdale said...

I hate swim suits. They always have 'tips' for suits that 'hide your flaws.' I have yet to find one that can make 'Betsy' (my tummy) dissapear. Maybe they should start giving away a free lipo with every suit. Now that would solve my problem!

On another note - I used to always lose things in my purse and I have since found that multiple pockets are key. Everything goes in a specific pocket so when my phone rings I am not digging through my purse only to find it as soon as it stops ringing. Oh and $5 pizza is yummy - both Little Caesers and 5 buck - lucky girls!

Lybbert's said...

hahahaHAHAhaAH! Ohhh - those crazy times! At least, you're not like that crazy lady who's always buying something new to replace what she lost. To replace something that she put in a "special" place that she wouldn't forget... grrr.


Chelsie said...

Haha..I loved it. Blasted swim suit models...that's not practical at all! They need normal models! Blast! I agree with megan though...pockets are key for've seen how much crap I carry around!! Good luck in the search! I'll keep my eyese pealed for you

HappyFLMom said...

I freaking hate swimsuit models. I freaking love purses. We are two peas in a pod.

Try Vera Bradley purses. Not too big, not too small, and oh so adorable with their snazzy patterns and colors.


Lola said...

Girl!!! I sent you my info already!!! My name is really Jana......if you don't have it I'll resend!!

I feel so loved and wanted!!

barlows said...

Let's not be too hasty. I, too, love the big purses (although now we're sporting a fabulous big diaper bag), but I kept losing stuff in the abyss (and my husband would ALWAYS roll his eyes at me when it was time to dig for the keys.) SOO, I found a cute little makeup bag that I can put all my essentials (lipstick, keys, phone, etc.)in. It's easy enough to access even with everything else that gets dumped in the big purse. Just a thought, cuz sacrificing a cute bag is hardly an easy thing.

Alison Wonderland said...

Maybe they were old, fat, harried and body destroyed mothers and those bathing suits just made them look like 16yr olds.

Bonnie said...

I am glad the car helped. Sorry about losing things in the bottom of you purse. That is why mine are all tiny. Skinny swimsuit models should be shot.

Leeann said...

LOL You are so cute. I love your ranting and raving.
And I found the BEST swimwear to cover all my stretch marks...a wet suit. You should try it. LOL